A co-worker asked for my assistance with Mark 10:7, Matthew 19:5, 6; and Ephesians 5.

I thought this might be beneficial to many others, so I'll post my response here:

Your first reference, Mark 10:7, is in context within Mark 10:1-12, where the Pharisees are questioning Jesus concerning divorce. Of course, they’re not looking for answers, they’re hoping to trip up Jesus.

Jesus shows that Moses’ law allowed divorce, but that permission should not be used: It was because of the hardness of heart that Moses wrote the commandment (Mark 10:5). It was to keep them from murdering their wives if they could not divorce them. So no one should divorce unless he were first willing to admit that his heart was so hard that he needed this permission.

Jesus reminds them that God made them “male and female.” One man. One woman. Notice that Adam could not leave Eve for another woman. There was no other woman to have. It is a mindset for every married couple to continue in: there is no other man or woman for you to go to. Remember also that Eve came from Adam’s rib. He could not remove her from himself without literally removing a piece of himself. Also notice that, although all other creatures were made male and female, only man is given this command. Marriage is for a higher purpose than pleasure and procreation. Marriage is a rational choice in humans, and it is for the noble purpose of helping each other. Remember that God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make a helper fit for him.” (Genesis 1:18) (Also we alone of creation were created in the image of God. Seriously consider that: as bearers of the image of God, whatever we do reflects on God. If we murder, as representative images of God we declare to the world that God is a murderer. If we lie, we represent God as a liar. How can we pray, “Hallowed be your name” if by our actions we drag his name in the mud.)

The law stated that the man must “leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife.” The marriage relationship is closer than even the bond between parent and child. By nature, you can never stop being your child’s parent. It is a biological certainty. Yet God will separate you from your parents and bond you to your spouse with a bond greater than nature. Not only is the relationship intimately close, but it is eternal – without end – forever. [Cue: Natalie Cole, “This Will Be (An Everlasting Love)”] The man is to hold fast to his wife so that he cannot be separated from her. The result: they are no longer two but one flesh. There is nothing more intimate than this. Your child is a piece of you, but your spouse is you. And it is a sacred thing and must not be violated. God has fitted them together and intends for them to live together in love until death alone parts them. Man did not invent marriage. It is divine, and should be seen as such.

As marriage is a type of the relationship between Christ and the church, anyone lightly considering divorce should strongly consider the implications if Christ were to take His relation to them as lightly. Malachi 2:16, “For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the Lord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.”

Your second text, Matthew 19:5, 6, is in the context of Matthew 19:3-12, which is Matthew’s account of the same scene from Mark 10.

Now to Ephesians 5:21-33. Notice that I started with 5:21, not 5:22. “Submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.” Submission is mutual as we bear one another’s burdens. No one “lords” over another. We all do our many duties as unto Christ. It is always easier to be submissive and yielding to someone else who is also being submissive and yielding to you.

Now, on with verse 22-33. A wife’s duty is to submit to her husband as to the Lord. This, of course, includes honoring and obeying him, because you love him. You do this also because God has commanded you to do it, so in doing it you are obeying God. Notice that you give glory to God by having a right relationship with your husband, and also that God wants you to have a right relationship with your husband to the degree that he has commanded it.

Paul says that the husband is the head (not the tyrant) of the wife. Your head is very important to your body. Without it you can’t think or feel – or eat! Your man has a great responsibility handed to him by God. Remember what God said to Eve, “Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.” The concern that immediately flares in women’s minds over this is the effect of sin coming into the world. Were we in our original created state, there would be no concern over this submission. A man would love his wife as he should, and his wife would gladly submit to him. Sin has spoiled this. But that’s not the end of it! Remember, in Christ we are the New Creation. By going to God, through Christ, in His Spirit, a believing wife can gladly submit to her husband as Eve still in her perfection submitted to Adam. Which leads into the next phrase, “as Christ is the head of the church.” In a marriage relationship, the husband represents Christ’s authority over the church. “And is himself its Savior.” How does Christ exercise His headship? He delivers His church from evil. He gives her everything good for her. So the husband must protect his wife. He should never place her in a compromising position. He must deliver her from evil. He also provides for her. That doesn’t mean a Cadillac in the driveway. But he does see to her needs. In other words, he does everything within his power to make it easy for her to submit to him. Sometimes he’s going to have to make very difficult decisions – as when he must withhold something she thinks she needs but he knows would place to great a weight of temptation on her, and so he could not both provide this to her and protect her from evil. But he should also have such a reputation of provision and love to his wife that she knows he is acting in her best interest. (And that’s a lesson we should strongly remember in our relationship with God. When has God not acted in your best interest? Don’t doubt Him when things seem difficult. He’s always working things out for the best.)

“Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.” The church should gladly, faithfully, exactly, humbly submit to Christ. So that is how a wife should submit to her husband in everything that is not contrary to her duty to God. (Your husband cannot order you to commit murder or adultery or perjury.)

“Husbands, love your wives.” This should prevent their abusing their wife’s submission. Christ’s love for the church is true love. It is complete love. Utter love. There is nothing inappropriate in this love. It is passionate. Could there ever be a more burning love exemplified than for Christ to transcend time to choose his Bride before He ever created the universe, to witness her fall and willingly deliver Himself up for scorn, abuse, violence, and death to redeem her... And a passion so great that death itself could not keep him down! He shattered the bonds of death and rose victoriously to place his Spirit within her as an engagement bond until the day when He is reunited with her in perfect bliss. That’s passion! And that’s the love a man must have for his wife. She must be his greatest joy! She is his every delight. Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, and that love will more than overcome any fear of subjection.

“That he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.” Look at the end goal of Christ’s sanctifying the church – she will be glorified. Husbands, what’s the end goal of your ardent, passionate love for your wife? Also notice that he is presenting her to himself. You alone know all the glories of your wife.

“In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies.” Men do not naturally deny themselves, so they should not deny their wives. Nourish your wife. Cherish your wife. Isn’t it amazing with how much care and tenderness a man can treat himself? And if a man sees a gadget that’s going to make his life easier, he will buy it. A man doesn’t starve himself. Treat your wife the way you want to treat yourself. Christ will do whatever it takes to present you holy and blameless to himself. A man must love his wife the same way.

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” Again, we go back to Genesis. This does not mean that a man is no longer obligated to his parents or other relations. This means that the marriage relationship takes top priority. If ever pushed to choose between a parent or his wife, the man must choose his wife.
So, husbands let your passionate love for your wife prevail as your primary desire in all of life. Wives, love your husband. Prize him.

That is how God intends marriage to be. Pray for it, knowing you are asking for His will to be done.